Tuesday, December 30, 2008
I just wish it could all linger a little longer. Maybe hear the holiday music a day or two longer. Let me ease out of being in overdrive. Now I'm bored out of my mind. I feel like I should still be doing 20,000 different things, but really - I just have 20,000 loads of laundry that are waiting on me.
So I here I sit. A little bored, feeling nostalgic that the year is almost over, and pondering what the new year will bring us.
I hope your Holiday was as fabulous as ours and that your new year brings you nothing but joy, laughter and happiness!!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
We now have one very happy boy in his dino Snuggie. Oh.... and two not so happy boys as I only had enough fleece on hand for one.
The nice thing about making it was I could make adjustments as I saw fit. I shortened it a bit so when walking he wouldn't trip and made it smaller over all.
Guess I'll be hitting the fabric store tonight!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
For instance. Last week I was working with the kids in small groups on some Christmas projects. We're all chatting away when my son pipes up that he wants an "easy bake, whatcha gonna make", A.K.A easy bake oven, for Christmas. The girls all pipe up that they want one to which causes him to defend his desire by stating that it's for boys too because they have blue ones. So me in my need to defend my son, who in no way needed defending, butts in and tells them all that some of the most famous chefs in the world are men. One kid says "oh yeah thats true. But my dad can't cook". One chimes in "mine can cook but my mom won't let him'. And the last? She pipes up that her "dads lazy and doesn't do anything".
I think I need to start putting a mic on The Big One so I can hear the dirt he's dishing on us at school. Oh to be a fly on the wall in that classroom.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Thanks Giving went off with out a hitch. Dinner was fantastic. If you've never brined your turkey I recommend you give it a shot. It makes the juiciest, tenderest, most flavorful bird. Ever. We all ate way to much, but still couldn't stop stuffing our faces. We had a great time playing Mario Kart on the Wii and ended the night all splayed out on the sofa and floor watching Attack of the Killer Tomatoes. Never seen it? Check it out. One of the all time cheesiest movies.
Friday was a day a laziness. We lounged all day in our P.J.'s and played video games. We also set the Christmas tree up. The boys had a ball decorating but it was tough for me. This is the first year in 5 years we had ornaments on the whole tree. In the past only the top half was decorated because there was always a baby around to pull the ornaments off. But not this year. And then I turned into a blubbering mess as we hung Leah's ornament on the tree.
Then we have Saturday. The day. We had a busy day planned. Went to the Christmas parade with my family and then had dinner at my parents house. The boys were having so much fun there that my mom asked if they could spend the night. Of course the wanted to. We left shortly after that and I was finally able to relax and just let it all out. I bawled like a fricken baby the whole 45 minute drive home. And then I crawled in bed and didn't come out until midday Sunday.
While I'd give anything to have Leah here with me, I've taken to focusing on the amazing gifts she gave me. She's taught me humility and empathy in away I could have ever known. I've learned to give people the benefit of the doubt, because no matter how well they look on the outside, you just can't tell how broken they really are inside. And that's the best way I can describe myself. Broken. Over the past year some of the pieces have started to fall back into shape. But some were so decimated that there are holes left in their place. And I'm sure no matter what, some those holes will always be there. Sure, I'll continue to heal. But I'll never be the person I was before Leah.